Pink Tulips

Yesterday started off real well. I got a full nights rest, started my day of in the Word and in prayer, and I was excited about the plans I had for my day. Jon was to start his lesson at 9am so I thought I would try to get to the grocery store across the street that sells powdered sugar since the grocery store next door only sells regular sugar.; I was also hoping that the store across the street opened at 8 am. At 8:10 I was out the door to grab my powdered sugar. I knew trying to cross the street on Vladimirskaya Street at 8 am would be terrible because of all the crazy traffic but really that was the least of my worries because as I quickly approached the sidewalk I saw something that I can't get out of my mind.There was an ambulance pulled on the side of the street, I quickly thought that maybe there was a bad car accident or someone had been run over but instead I saw an older woman lying on the floor with two doctors trying to resuscitate her with no avail. I knew in my heart of hearts that she was long gone. Who knew how long it took the ambulance to get to the scene. Here in Russia no one pulls over when the lights are blaring. In this little nook of Vladimiriskaya Street amidst the loud morning rush hour there was an eerie silence. A man who appeared to be her husband holding her purse and hat stood there lifeless and completely silent, the two female doctors worked on her in complete silence, and the driver of the ambulance stood in the background just staring at a scene that was probably all too familiar for him. No bystanders, no cars pulling over to see what was going on, and to the pedestrians walking by it seemed as if the scene was a complete nuisance to their day. I stood there for what seemed like hours even though it was a few seconds and watched in complete shock not knowing what to do or say. I made my way to the store in tears but to my demise the store wasn't even open yet. So, I crossed the street back to the scene to make my way home and once again just stood there to watch. This time one of the doctors jammed a syringe into her chest but to no avail. It was like an out of body experience or a nightmare that I couldn't wake up from. I made my way home in tears and in frustration.

At 10:15 I decided to return to the store knowing that I would not encounter the same scene again because for sure by now the ambulance would be gone with the woman. I also had the boys in tow because Jon was having his Russian lesson. As we approached the street the woman now laid on the sidewalk with her shirt half open and her coat pulled over her face. The man now stood with a man my age, who was probably the son, just waiting.

There are many images in our lives that we replay over and over in our minds and hearts that bring us much joy and happiness.Then there are those horrid images that we can't seem to forget about it. I cried all morning long mainly out of sadness, frustration, and guilt.I don't know what I could have done but I wish I would have something.

My Friday had to continue though. After Jon's lesson, I had a one hour lesson with the language teacher. Then it was time to get lunch ready.At 2 pm I had our wive's group meeting. For a couple of hours I was able to briefly forget my morning. When I came home I opened one of the doors to the entrance of our apartment and was confronted again with another image of death. This time it was the cover of a coffin and next to it was a wooden Russian Orthodox cross.It seems that one of the neighbors on our floor has died. It is Russian custom to bring the dead body into your home so that friends and family can come and view the body and "pay their respects". Most likely tomorrow they will bury her. She was an older woman also and probably the grandmother of the drunkards and drug addicts that we often encounter on our floor. One time Jon was out early in the morning and saw this grandmother being carried in by her daughter. The grandmother was wasted, dirty, and covered with debris and leaves.......probably from being passed out all night long.



I am pretty much certain that these two women did not know Jesus as their Lord and Savior. Yesterday two women entered into an eternity of torment and pain….. from one hell into another.

So, why pink tulips? Last night we had friends for dinner.They brought me a bouquet of pink tulips.I love tulips and I love that my friends and the beautiful flowers are the last images I have of my sobering Friday.