Adenosarcoma: The Beast That Killed My Sister

 I've attempted to write this post several times but each time I go to write all I do is stare at the title. It still seems like a bad dream that I can't wake from but on November 11, 2021 I lost my sister to cancer. In the early morning hours on a Thursday morning her faith was made sight and she left behind two daughters, her mother, two sisters, two brother-in-laws, three nephews, and a niece. All of us utterly heartbroken and in disbelief in what transpired in one short year.

Happier days at a Tim McGraw concert.

To begin with I will note that my sister Monica was a work horse. She had an incredible work ethic and I often called her a work-a-holic. This isn't necessarily always a good thing and in her case her career took priority in many assets of her life, one being her health. In May of 2020 she started experiencing some abdominal pain and a nagging cough. Unfortunately, due to COVID, her doctor had gone solely to telemedicine and my sister wasn't really getting anywhere with her doctor. Each time she was just told to go to urgent care and every time she went to urgent care she was told it was probably COVID and to do a COVID test.  Due to her heavy work schedule she didn't want to wait around and usually ended up going home or back to work. As the summer went on she wasn't improving. She eventually was referred to an oncologist surgeon but again, due to COVID, the process was slow...too slow. A tumor was eventually found but getting a surgery date was impossible...again...due to COVID. We came to the point where the surgeon told my sister to go to the emergency room and "do your best to get admitted" so that he could perform emergency surgery. 

She was admitted and her surgeon was able to perform the surgery removing a tumor. I received a phone call from the surgeon on November 18, 2020 after the surgery and he told me that the tumor didn't look cancerous and that he was positive about the outcome of the surgery. Of course we were elated. Tragically, two days later on November 20 my sister called me and my other sister to share with us that she had a rare form of cancer and that there wasn't a cure for it. I was in my bathroom getting ready for guests to come when I took the call. I won't forget the utter sadness I felt. I was numb. My first thoughts went to my mom. Who was going to tell her? She would be devastated. Then I knew I would have to tell my two sons who absolutely adored her. She was their Tia Monica. I don't know how I functioned that evening. My husband said we could call and let our guests know what was going on but I refused. I went into sort of an auto-pilot mode and honestly I've felt that way from the moment I heard that news until today. 

I haven't blogged in so long and I thought it would be a great way for me to chronicle my grief, my memories, and what has helped me through the last two years. I don't know if anyone even reads my blog anymore but I am not writing it for an audience but mainly for myself...to help me remember because I never want to forget my sister and all the memories we shared together.